Speed Dating, ice cream, rain, FUN FUN FUN!

It's been a while. but. HERE I AM!! IN HAWAII!!! (AND it's been pouring rain all day! So much for the beach!)

I'm working as an RA right now and I've just set up a program for next week.

SPEED DATING!!! These little hoodlums better come and enjoy this activity!! I put a bold emphasis on the words "root beer floats and cookies" :)

I'm looking forward to this next week for this activity and to start really focusing on school. I've realized something lately and I'm excited to finalize plans so that I can start telling people. STAY TUNED! I've been feeling so happy lately, I can't complain. I've been meeting a lot of fun girls and look forward to my classes. There has been one class that's kinda scared me lately so I decided I needed to change my attitude. It's been a humbling experience for me. As soon as I changed my attitude I started learning so much! It's actually the class I'm looking forward to the most. Tomorrow I have all day off so some of us girls are planning on running errands all over "exploring hawaii" I'm looking forward to it! AND I'm off to lunch. Hope everyone is having a happy day as well!

oh. found this picture the other day on my laptop. (me and mom right before our trip to hawaii!) MISS YOU MOM!! LOVE YOU!!

New Places. New Faces

I don't know how to gather my thoughts yet but, it's official, I'm living in Hawaii now. I've just moved into my dorm this afternoon and am NOT living out of a suitcase anymore. Thank heavens.

I started training for my new job today which goes on until Tuesday. There are various levels of how strict or not strict we need to be with our new job and the level of importance we are, amongst other things. In all honesty I can't help but be a little uneasy, nervous, overwhelmed. I feel for the next few months I'll definitely be depending on the Lord more. I don't know what I would do without prayer. I feel like I've been lost lately in my life, living out of suitcases, moving around, and now I'm finally settled and THROWN into it! I'm super nervous for this next chapter in my life because I'm still unsure about some choices I am making. They're good choices but, are they the best choices? Is there a better choice for me out there? Am I wasting my time?

I guess all I can say and express now is that this an experience now that I just have to pray that everything will work towards my benefit. I hope this next experience in life will mold me and shape me. I don't know what to expect but through out life we don't know what to expect. All the Lord can ask from us is to be prepared as much as we know how.

Ground Yourself

I've got a problem. Two Words = JET. LAG.

I'm currently staying in Utah for the next couple weeks. I will be returning back to Hawaii on the 16th. Lately I've been really confused about my life and what the heck I am doing, mostly because I've been living out of a suitcase for over a month. As soon as I got off the plane here in Utah I immediately felt at home. "oh dear" I can't start feeling that way, I'll want to move here.. then all over the country for me again. Not that pattern again. Today however was one of the first times I started to miss Hawaii a little bit. I've been in Utah for about 3-4 days now. I miss the beach, I miss family and I'm looking forward to start my job when I get back and start meeting people from all over the world. I'm looking forward to grow my roots. I think Hawaii will be a great opportunity for me. My first couple days here I could tell this is what I've been missing in my life, independence, laughter, being forced to meet other people my age on my own. I sincerely miss that in my life and I realized that's why I've loved Utah. It will always have a special place in my heart.

There has been some other reasons I've been lost lately and that includes relationships, love, friendships, etc. The other night I had a conversation with a really good/old friend of mine. He reminded me once again who I am. He made me realize my losses in the past can be made overcome and not through my constant moving around that I've been doing for the last 6 months, but by simply depending on those around me, getting on my knees and praying, find something to ground yourself and get to enjoy yourself again. I guess I've been a little bitter and a little hurt from different relationships that I've had these past couple years. Some relationships could have ended better, but some happened for a reason and at the time that they needed to. If there's one lesson I've learned in my life that has been huge it's knowing that you can't change anyone. No matter how hard you try, no matter how much you love and care for someone, they have to change for themselves. It hurts to stand by and let someone disregard who they are but agency is a god given gift for each of us individually and we have to learn to accept that we can't or SHOULDN'T take that away from ANYONE!

One of my best friends is getting married this weekend. (The Blonde in the picture with me!) I'm THRILLED!!! It's amazing to talk to her and listen to her talk about an eternal progression in her life. I'm slightly envious but more so thrilled and excited for this next chapter in her life. The more friends I see get married, the more I desire it for myself. My envy is their happiness my goal is to have that same happiness someday.

Like one girl spoke in her testimony this weekend, there is a reason for everything and there is a reason that it happens when it does. The truth of the gospel and life is we are learning and progressing step by step individually. Sometimes that step is a quicker pace for another or slower for someone else, but in the end we are all reaching that same end result and if we have that in mind we will have a deeper understanding and respect for everyone around us.

I just need to keep in mind to always look up and never down at my feet. Don't be so hard on yourself if you trip, just lift your head up high again and dust yourself off. Like is about discoveries even if it's in a way we don't want to discover.